I was on Facebook earlier today and read a post from one of my friends, Deyna, who had quoted Napoleon Hill:
“Neglecting to broaden their view has kept some men doing one thing all their lives”
I don’t know if you’ve ever been there, but have you ever felt like your vision is so shallow, narrow, and short?
If you know what I mean, it is a feeling that all you can see is what is immediately happening around you at the moment. You respond rather than create. You react instead of dream. You feel stuck instead of free. You feel anchored instead of alive. You feel like you are living to be safe and please others instead of risking and offending.
That is how I feel as the year starts off. I’m just being honest here. I feel like I am not living the life I was meant to live and could live.
Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy my life and I love my God, and I am not whining or complaining. I realize I have a pretty ideal life, having worked from home full-time since 2004. That’s pretty amazing!
But, sometimes it is time for a new adventure and new territory to be conquered and explored.
Sometimes it is time for a change of scenery with what seems to inhibit my vision and obstruct my view.
Sometimes I feel that God wants to write on my heart something new, but I stand in the way as I fight to survive in my daily existence.
Sometimes I want to risk it all, lay it all out there, and free fall.
Sometimes I wish…
Ahhh… there’s no time to wish, and certainly not enough energy. I have a mortgage to pay, school tuition, a minivan that needs to be replaced, and I simply don’t know if I have the strength to wish. I’m feel tired.
But, I know, that if I don’t fight for something new and fresh, and don’t yield my life, hope, and future to God’s design, soon, I will forget that I was ever meant to live, dream, soar, or wish.
In talking with Traci, my wife, I was telling her about these thoughts, and I made the analogy of how rocks and boulders get beaten down and made smooth over time by the crashing of the waves. That’s how I feel. I feel as if the crap of this life, financial worries, concerns, and more crap just beats me down and makes me smooth.
I don’t want to be smooth, as stupid as that sounds. I want to have an edge to me.
So, as of today, I am moving forward, with what little strength I have, and what short-sighted and narrow vision I have, to explore, pray, seek and set out on a quest for something new and something fresh.
I’m not really sure what that means. I’m not sure that is for me to define right now.
Which is probably how any quest starts… moving toward the unknown, putting my faith in the One who will guide me to whatever risk, land, life, or mission He leads.
Hopefully… to be continued…